"When a mercenary group takes a lavish wedding hostage, they have no idea what they are in for as the maid of honor is actually a secret agent ready to rain hellfire upon anyone who would ruin her best friend's wedding." 

OUR MOVIE REVIEW:

It’s unfathomable that the same man behind Lara Croft: Tomb Raider is behind this. What a disastrous offering in each and every way, with its shockingly poor execution that derives from its odd editing choices to its failure to land a single comedic beat. Clearly most of the comedy is offered through improvisation, I say that because of how awkwardly the jokes land - a Wordle joke… how timely. 

I used to enjoy Rebel Wilson’s shtick, especially when it was involved in the Pitch Perfect franchise; Isn’t It Romantic was the last time a project even partially landed with her involvement. Advertised as the reuniting of the Pitch Perfect cast in an asinine marketing plow, Bride Hard in actuality leaves a majority of the cast behind and only reunites Wilson and Anna Camp. 

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Why someone like Oscar winner Da’Vine Randolph would agree to a project like this is beyond me. She offers the longest spouts of dialogue that seem to mean to lighten the seriousness of the situation, but the tone is always spoiled by it. The performances as a whole are stiff, unsure of what to do with the material at hand. “We’re all gonna probably die, let’s improv through this.” A large wedding turned hostage situation full of characters with either loud, obnoxious and unfunny personalities (the bridemaids) or completely mute ones with barely any focus given to them (almost every other person). 

Stephen Dorff plays the definition of a stereotypical villain in a B-movie - with the sole reason to rob the elite of their wealth. There’s not a lot to be surprised by, as his motives and ultimate downfall are as predictable as it can get. Double crosses are ineffective when there’s hardly any development to coincide with them. Sure they move the plot forward, but they hold no relevance to the emotional ties that lie nonexistent. 

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Simon West is known for surreal action in his earlier work and Bride Hard submerges itself into an endless pool of the generic. The largest issue with the action doesn’t lie in the editing per se but in the fact that it’s so obvious when the stunt doubles take their position. The CGI cripples any promise the action may have when things get explosive, because when the green screen is deployed… the experience becomes a whole new level of ridiculously cheap.  

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Simon West’s filmmaking here resembles an amateur not capable of finding their rhythm with an incredibly slim budget on tap. The budget for this is unknown, but I’d hope aside from the location they shot in - it’s as close to the bare minimum as it can get. Bride Hard is a less than subtle play on Die Hard, having hostages taken and one person in charge of taking them all down - this is yet another tasteless ripoff that serves more as an act of endurance than anything that resembles the classic.